Writers' war
by TheO0032
Summary: It is a normal day in the CCD, when the camera crew runs out of 4th wall-windo-cameras. It ends up a portal to the real world, which, because of a scientific breakthrough, was engulfed into a distortion TS portal. Long story short, it is an all out war, the TA and characters versus everyone else over the CCD. Can they do it? Read the rest of the transport files first to get context


**_Chapter -3: Bigger Description: Self-explanatory_**

It was a normal day in the CCD. Until the camera crew uses broken cameras. They serve as portals to and from TS. Just as it is thought that it cannot get any worse, random events create a distortion TS where everyone is evil. The TA must battle versus a bunch of evil other TAs and their writings. And if that wasn't enough, the legendary Pokemon have not liked the author. How will they be stopped? Note: In order to understand this, you need to know about Pokemon, Pearls before Swine, the comic strip, and have decent knowledge of Phineas and Ferb.

 ** _Chapters -2 to 0: Prologue: Self explanatory yet again._**

Okay, here's another transport file! (Cheers can be heard)

[Stop it, Parenthesis!](Get out of the scene!)[You should stop anyway]

TA: Do you want me to give you amnesia, Brackets?

[Fine. The scene was quite scientific. It looked like a spaceship from one of those-]

Camera crew: Cut, cut.

TA: What's wrong?

Camera crew: We ran out of unbroken 4th wall-window-cameras. That means we need to use the broken ones from parts unknown. So the distortion TS is coming to get us. We'll need to battle TFDs, Other TAs, Romance and shipping, and your opposite, Jolteon Master.

TA: Got it. Battle stations! Arm the Parasite nets, instant TransFormation ray, bacterial and viral enhancements, and injections. It is going to be an all out war against romance, the unstoppable genre, but we have a few tricks up our sleeves!

 ** _Chapter 1: Meanwhile, in professor Oak's lab…: Another Self explanatory thing thrown in for good measure_**

Professor Oak: Okay, I have created Mewthree! BWAHAHAHA! (An explosion kills Mewthree)

professor Oak: Noooooooooo!

Ash: Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeessss!

professor Oak: You will pay for this.

Ash: Noooooooooooo!

professor Oak: Actually your friends will. They will become the latest test subjects for my highly lethal plan!(Gets hit by a green Ray and turns into a Magicarp)

professor Oak: Magicarp Magicarp Magicarp

Author: Nailed 'em. Maybe I should reconfigure it?

TA: Next up is bacterial enhancements. Used these in What if, and they are quite high risk for getting rid of plot. But we need them if we ever want to write again. (Shoots)

(Meanwhile, back with Ash)

Ash: Oh no. Not this again. Knowing what happened in what if, I will become a mew. (Instantly transforms into a mew)

Ash: And misty a Lugia

(Misty instantly transforms into a Suicine. Ha! Got you there, Ash!)

Ash: And Brock will become a Pirate-Ninja.

(Brock instantly transforms into a Metagross)

Ash: And we will defeat Team Rocket…

(In the CCD)

Author: Bam Bam Bam. Got 'em all! Anyway, how does he know the plotline of What if? We mind-wiped him.

Narrator: It must be the broken 4th wall-window-camera.

Author: If it is messing up, then they should be here soon.

Camera crew: Backup barrier running thin. Soon, the writers from the distortion TS will come. Distortion is already happening as ASP is rushing in.

(ASP stands for anti-stability powder. It can destabilize the world, allowing mind wipes to be negated, attitudes to change, etc.. Luckily, the CCD is fine. We have an APS, or Anti Powder shield).

Team Rocket: We must defend the story. Otherwise there will be no more world to take over.

Boss: Drink these drinks and follow the instructions. Then we will defend. Until the death. (The drinks contain bacteria mutated by the mutate-inator. Oh, I blew it.)

Narrator: Oh no! Parenthesis got my attitude!

(Oh, I was just kidding.)

Author: That is nothing to joke about, Parenthesis.

[There is a tree to the left of them. Down the hill there are a whole lot of people, the residents of the CCD main planet being addressed-]

TA: No, brackets, we do not want a scene description from you.

[Awww, c'mon! I excel at the excessively detailed scene descriptions!]

(Well, there's nothing wrong with Brackets, at least.)

 ** _Chapter 2: Non-Pokemon Chaos: IDT and the Backup Barrier downfall_**

Author: We can go to sleep, and we will be alerted when the backup barrier falls.

(Change of scenes)

professor Oak: BWAHAHAHA! I have created Mewfour!

Team Rocket: Hey, that is our Pokemon.

Team Aqua: No it is ours!

Team Magma: No it is ours!

(Mewfour explodes the lab)

professor Oak: So much for that mutatinator…

Doofenshmirtz: Hey! That's my de-evolution-inator!

Parenthesis: GET OUT OF THE SCENE YOU BRAT!

Doofenshmirtz: No. I will not.

(In the CCD)

(Rat holds out a baseball bat)

Rat: Hold out your hand.

TA: That is a bat to the hand of a cartoonist.

Rat: People are calling in. They want me to bat people's hands. Someone paid $100 to me to bat your hand.

TA: Who wanted that to happen?

(Everybody turns to Brackets)

[Hey! I was getting annoyed there…]

TA: You are getting amnesia.(gives Brackets amnesia)

[Huh?]

TA: And who was responsible?

(Everyone turns to Stephan Pastis, who is sitting randomly on the right.)

Stephan Pasits: I couldn't do a thing. Once he learned to get out of my strip, he went to writers who hadn't used unbroken 4th wall-window-cameras. He terrorized countless Fanfictions. He made mischief everywhere. The Family Circus is a wreck, and Jim Davis isn't making his extreme amount of money anymore. And my strip just isn't the same without rat.

TA: We have problems too. First off-

Camera crew: Red Alert! The backup barrier has been broken! Chaos is pouring in! The APS is about to give in to the ASP! We have 3 hours, assuming they attack and we don't defend. We need to build an ASD(Atitude stability device)!

Rat: I'm waiting for you to hold out your hand!

TA:Stephan, delete 'em.

Stephan Pastis: Can't while he isn't in my strip.

TA: Well you can, author?

Author: No. He's not our character.

TA: Okay, so we need a universal delete button. Or a pun strip that makes a piece of paper work.

Stephan Pastis: No can do. I need to use the strips to make the crocs, who are invading, give up.

Zebra: Please?

TA: Fine. We'll make one on our own.

Narrator: And so they continue on discussing. But who is rustling in the bushes?

Jolteon Master: And we'll sneak up on 'em while they least expect it.

Camera crew: RED ALERT! Jolteon Master is here!

TA: Oh great! The only one he can't delete is me. I need to battle him myself!

Random referee: The Pokemon battle will take place between the leader, TA, and the Challenger, Jolteon Master! Any legendaries or mythical Pokemon will be automatically deleted! Let it begin!

Jolteon Master: Go! Jolteon!

TA: Go, Graveler!

Jolteon Master: Okay. And is it male?

TA: Yes. Why?

Jolteon Master: My Jolteon is female and knows attract! I knew you'd send out a rock type, and most rock types are male.

TA: Just kidding. My graveler is a female. I kept both genders, in case of attract.

Jolteon Master: Jolteon, Pin missile! My Jolteon is level 100. There's no way to beat it.

Narrator: Meanwhile…

Author: Oh come on! Your story doesn't have an author? Or Team Rocket's backfiring conspiracies?

"I": They are all first person.

Author: Ash! Distract him!

I: I can transform into any Pokemon because of one story.

Ash: I can replicate.

(Ash replicates 5 times)

Ash and his 5 copies: And we all can transform into any Pokemon in existence!

(Author looks around for parts)

Parenthesis: How is it without your control panel?

Author: I miss it. I want to create things from nowhere again.

Brackets: I'm jealous of the other Brackets.

Author: There isn't another Brackets. You are unique. For example "I" does Jolteon Master's stories.

Brackets: You do?

Author: No. Jolteon Master named his main character "I".

Brackets: I see.

Pig: No, not "I C", Just "I".

Brackets: You aren't making sense.

Pig: It's just "I". Just I. (Rages and falls down)

Brackets: Gee. Are you okay?

Author: And THAT was the strip for today? Rat is right. It is not funny at all. It didn't even help with the crocs!

Rat: Finally someone agrees with me.

Stephan Pastis: Fine.

(Outside the fortress)

(All the crocs get hit by random falling rocks)

Larry: Dat no gud. Retreet!

(Change of scenes)

Ash: Yeah, well I've been a major part in a bunch of stories! I control them in one way or another, unlike you, who never gets a say!

"I": Well I've been featured in many more stories!

Ash: Well, my author started way after you! It is probable that that would happen!(time of writing: September 2016)

(Change of scenes)

TA: Ha! I won! Now you get to choose a new Pokemon, and so do I!

Jolteon Master: But one question? How did you win? My Jolteon is level 100! Nothing can beat that!

TA: I caught it with a glitch that allows you to catch Pokemon higher than level 100. I left it in the daycare center, and got it to level 250. Then I added 5 levels. That is the true max! I might even be able to beat a level 100 water type.

Jolteon Master: Arggh! I hate glitches! The only way you could do that was inexplicable cross-game fusions! Anyway, status update from "I". Gotta take this.

"I": I'm losing to Ash! They put up plot-deteriorating power! We can't compete!

Jolteon Master: Got it. Sending in legendaries.

TA: Okay. Status update from the author. Gotta take this.

Author: I'm being invaded by legendaries! Invaded by legendaries!

 ** _Chapter 3: Invasion: The major battle_**

TA: Get the special forces! Paranets, TRBMs, and ITFWs. I'm sending the ASD. Please report.

Author: Copy. Parenthesis is battling other Pokemon with her own. Brackets with the eeveelutions, and the narrator is having a debate with Romance about story types.. Team Aqua and Magma will take care of the rest. I highly doubt them though. Stephan Pastis needs to take care of the non-Pokemon ones, with some help from Doofenshmirtz. I hope they are good.

TA: Good.

(Somewhere else)

Doofenshmirtz: Behold! My Comic strip demand-inator. Whoever you zap will want a big comic book! And you will be able to use it to save the whole entire tri-state area! Oops! I mean the whole entire dimension!

Stephan Pastis: Oh come on…

Doofenshmirtz: Now is there any evil use for this?

Author: Stephan, press the return button.

Stephan Pastis: On it. (Presses the button to remove Doofenshmirtz)

(Change of scenes)

Rat: Hold out your hand. I've been waiting for hours.

TA: I told you! I'm in the middle of a heated battle!

Jolteon Master: Go, Arctucuno!

(The Arctucuno gets deleted)

Jolteon Master: Go Zapdos!

(The Zapdos gets deleted)

Jolteon Master: Hey! Why aren't my legendaries staying out?

TA: This should buy us a little time Rat.

Rat: Are you a good drawer?

TA: There's only writing in this, so it doesn't matter.

Rat: Is there actual humor?

TA: I think…

Rat: Do you follow any trends!

TA: No!

Rat: I want to join your story.

TA: Really?

Rat: I changed my mind.

TA: Stephan! Don't waste a strip on that! You can end the event eventually!

Rat: Yeah!

Jolteon Master: Celibi, go!

(The Celibi gets deleted)

TA: You used up all your legendaries. Didn't you know that they get deleted when they are released?

Jolteon Master: Well, Arceus can't! Go Arceus!

(Arceus gets deleted)

TA: Even the author can delete Arceus!

Jolteon Master: Nooooooooooooooooooo! I surrender!

(Meanwhile)

Ash: And, eventually, I was killed, only to be revived by a leech seed.

Narrator: Oh come on! Stop spoiling it for the readers, Ash! The TA didn't even write that yet!

Author: That was what I told him! But he didn't listen.


End file.
